I wonder if when you’re sitting at your desk at night working diligently if your mind wanders to the days when you’d message me. I wonder if the tap of the keys on your keyboard makes you long for days when you could reach out and talk to me just to lighten the load and offer a brief distraction from the mundane. Does your heart flutter at the intense memory that streaks across your mind unexpectedly? I can imagine the light of your computer screen illuminating the embers of your beautiful eyes as you sit in the dark of your office, phone face down, and your fingers nimbly reach to lift it to see if I’ve sent you a love note. Second nature? Bad habit? Or a manifestation of the love you’ve repressed? I imagine a fight against what you want to do, even if brief, to stay focused on the task at hand. You don’t let your mind wander too far these days, I’m sure. I can see the curve of your hands against the keyboard; your long, strong legs stretched out and crossed at the ankle; I can see your eyes, tired, peering at the screen in front of you; your shoulders, wide and strong, slightly rolled forward in a relaxed posture as you work. I long to sit and watch you and take in all of your majesty. I admire your work ethic. I adore your tenderness. I envy your strength and determination. You are a masterpiece by God himself. It’s a wonder that I was blessed to spend the time with you that I did. We had so many precious, wonderful moments together. Times I will never forget and will hold dear to my heart for all of my days. Regardless of what happens from this day forward, a large part of my heart will always be yours as I am completely in love with you.
The Repressed Peach