Intimacy.

I miss the build up to sex with strong foreplay, kissing, talking, pulling, rubbing. I want to feel that unbridled passion, the carnal need writhing through my veins. I want to feel the magic slip between us as we become one over and over again. Each feeding off of the others need and desire to satisfy every craving. To straddle your lap and allow your length to fill my body and stay there for a while. To feel the warmth of your body against mine, your chest sticking to mine with sex sweat, wrap my arms around your neck while you embrace me and hold my body with your strong hands. To let hours and hours of night or day slip by without a care in the world.

I love the ache in my legs from being stretched far and wide after a good night of playing together. I love the aftershocks of orgasm pulsing through my body hours afterwards. I miss the feel of being so wanted that a man feels hunger in his body to devour me. I want the hunger of his kiss pressed firmly against my lips, the growth of his manhood grinding into my pelvis, the heat of his body melting into me with pure, uncontrollable desire. I miss someone making me theirs. I miss someone taking control and giving me everything and taking all they want while I generously return the favor.

I want the chemistry and connection that really allows all of this to come to life. Without that chemistry, the spark of electricity between two souls, it’s all just mechanics. But that spark, that spark is everything. That’s when you know you’re creating magic, you’re warping time and casting spells into the universe that cannot be undone. I don’t know any magic more powerful than two people with fantastic chemistry combining their essence into that cosmic energy which creates life.

If God himself found this connection with another celestial being then I might just believe in the Big Bang theory and the birth of the cosmos. It’s all so fucking serene, intense, brilliant, and mind blowingly awesome… this connection.

I miss the post-orgasm cry that consumes my body after someone makes love to me. I miss the lighthearted conversation and gentle touches while laying side by side recounting the day and winding up for round 2 (or 3 or 4). I miss the tender loving shower or sticky sleep that soon follows. I enjoy the adventures in playtime. I miss exploring your body and finding new ways to excite you. I miss being able to follow my intuition and read your body language to know what you need next. I miss listening to your breath and the love noises you make when I’m on the right track. I miss intuitively knowing what your manhood needs to find his release.

I miss our energy. I miss the connection that transfers so easily between us as though the moon is looking at his stars. I miss your sweet kiss and the passion that springs back to life in my belly. I miss your strong hug, the one that sends a message straight to my soul that says “I’m here. You’re ok.” It’s like we find each other all over again each time we hug. No time is like the last and each time feels like the first time. So fucking beautiful baby. Just beautiful.

It’s the simple, easy things between us that make the erotic moments so intense. The way we respond to each other. The words we use in our conversation. The moments we share where no physical interaction is taking place but our cup gets filled with love and adoration for each other. It’s the moments when I feel a strand of jealousy weave through my heart because someone is laughing with you and I missed it for some reason. It’s the locking of our eyes when we meet at a game or event and we search for each other across the field or the room. It’s the light conversation exchanged as we stroll down a hallway together. It’s in the shared jokes and memories of moments spent sharing an office together. The moments when you say something coy and flirty in a room full of people and nobody knows what you meant but me. It’s the gentle brush of your hand against the back of mine. The lean of your body toward me as I speak. The gentle touch of your hand at the small of my back as you allow me to walk into a room first. The fire that burns deep in the back of your eyes as you place your forehead against mine and search my eyes before kissing me. Your sweet words are like honey to my soul. You say kind words all the time. Even if we are laughing and cutting up, your words don’t hurt. You’re thoughtful and compassionate. Sincere and honest. Loving and passionate. And god knows how much more I could say about that, but we just work baby. We just do. And I love everything about it because those times when I’m enjoying the length of your wand inside me as we cast spells together, I know I’m safe in all ways. I know you always have my heart, mind, body, and soul in the safest place it’s ever been; in your heart.

Always and forever yours,

The Repressed Peach

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