The power of six experiences of the same emotions fleeting, yet significant.
The power of six times a thought entered my mind, rested, then flitted off.
The power of six moments where life didn’t seem all that important anymore.
The significance of six times I thought everyone else deserved life more than I did.
The magnitude of six moments where the actions of others made me question my value as a human being.
Six times I won’t ever get back.
Six moments of darkness that seeped into my soul and clung with the claws of negativity.
Six times I felt my soul was being trampled on.
Six times I felt the weight of the world imploding in me.
Six times six thousand and forever after that, I will never allow my soul to be trapped in the darkness of despair and contemplate suicide. Never again. I vow to myself that these thoughts will never be allowed to manifest in my mind. I will get help immediately if things get dark. I will talk to my people. I will surround myself with love and hope. I will seek God and find grace in his goodness. I will forgive myself and others more quickly and allow the moments to pass as they arrive. I will not hold on to any negativity any longer than it needs to stay. I will bask in the beauty of God’s love and understanding. I will do all this and more to ensure my mind stays healthy and clear even when life’s troubles seem too big.
I pray that in time, I will learn to let go and not take people’s mean words and unkind behavior to heart. Maybe in time I will grow past the power of the language of others used against me. And in time, I will speak my truth more confidently and save myself from pain.
With time and in truth,
The Repressed Peach
Musings of Life 